The Stay at Home Connection

So part of the joy of being a stay-at-home Mom is staying at home. Which I love. Really love. But there is a thing as spending too much time in your home. Especially one that is 'staged' and on-the-market. I am feeling that right now. For instance... RIGHT NOW I was supposed to be getting a pedicure at a delightful-strip-mall-Asian-Nail-Salon-and-Spa, and instead am listening to William (who is in bed and supposed to be taking a rest) prattle out "Mom- what's 16 + 16 + 23 +16 again?" Now- I am all about addition facts, mind you, but I was looking forward to some "me" time and am feeling a bit selfish. Tyler is still kindly sleeping in his carseat- (like I had asked him to before we got in the car) but instead of said Asian Salon and lunch date with my cousin, we re-routed to school. You see, the scenario changed when William had a "side ache" that forced his teachers to call me to come get him. I realize, sincerely realize, that illnesses are rampant and as a Nurse, feel compelled to pick up any and all kids who are sick at school. So I turned the car and picked up crying Will.

However, being the Smart Nurse that I am I deduce that the Tums I gave William "cured" his side-ache which was most likely due to the 2+ bowls of Raisin Bran that he had for breakfast. [We have discussed fiber a lot this afternoon and why gas in your stomach is different than the gas that you put in your car.] We live and we learn, yes. And- whereas he had "no appetite" at lunch, he wolfed down 2 slices of honey toast and cheese and crackers immediately upon arriving home-- in between running around after matchbox cars. And he stated that his tummy-ache was most likely due to it being "dry" since he was hungry. (Sigh.) However, I am elated that he is not truly sick. Yet.

But, a realization came to me as I was selfishly resenting my "me" time vanishing. Pedicures and lunches can be re-scheduled. Reading the "Cat in the Hat" three times cannot. These last 12 weeks since Tyler's birth have been a precious chance to re-direct and challenge my ways of thinking and routines. Why am I here? What do I love? Do I appreciate what I have?

I remember a long time ago some sort of quotation or expression that says where you choose to spend your time shows what is important to you. And of course, it's all about balance. Not all of us have the luxury of a spouse with a good income or a job that brings Joy along with the stress and not all of us are blessed with the gift of children. But how and when and where we spend our time says a lot.

So this journal entry is to remind me of the gift of the stay-at-home connection. Kids don't wait to grow up. Babies learn to be kids way too fast and I wish I could stay in the moment of being Mom. The Mom who is all knowing as I add up 16 +16 + 23 + 16, the Mom who can fix a side-ache with Tums and a hug, and the Mom who can nurse a baby into a wonderful sleepy semi-coma. The Mom who has time for a 26-step paper-mache' Gallimimus dinosaur project and cookies and play-doh and patty-cake. The Mom who can ellicit The Smile... the most beautiful smile from my 3 month-old baby who adores me. I wish I could push pause on this gift of being the stay-at-home Mom.